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Saturday, July 24, 2004

She..

They say, you *start* blogging when you are either too happy or too sad..or when something very different is happening with you..and then when it eases out..u continue blogging coz u have started it. :)..u start blogging when u are overloaded with thoughts..they're like a tap without a washer..leaks all the time..and who ever u find can listen to u..u just tell him/her..coz its just too much for ur brain to keep..u want the flow to be there always..so that there is always space for new thoughts..and then there comes a point when u have the sacred realization that ppl might not be interested in ur overflowing thoughts and feeling.Full Stop. You *start* blogging. :)

And here comes the declaration...the declaration of the millenium..**I START BLOGGING NOW**...

so what it is?..wats happening with me?...ok to be true..i am not myself..when it comes to her..i am not myself..cant control myself..

more than that I think why it is all happening with me..was i meant to undergo such pain..on the other hand i am thankful to HIM for making me feel a unique feeling..a feeling of a life time..i hope next time it happens..(ah!! next time..??..noway)..ya so i hope next time it happens i am able to control myself...now i am not able to see and think beyond, what is being shown to me..i hope smday i will get my answers..


today she is leavin the town and does not want me to come to the station so that i can explain to her..wat she means to me..i dont want to see her when she does not want me to..she talks to me ..fine..but why do i get a feeling that she is just doing that for the sake of it..are we frens?...i hope she is not playing with me..she says we are frens..but i hope she means it..i do not know wat will i do ...will i go or not..will i get to c her or not..i dont know..i think once again it will be based on my instincts..coz thinking and planning in this matter is not possible for me.

I am mostly a positive thinker..everything that happens..happens for gud..but wat gud is coming out of it??..i cant sleep..i cant work..i cant eat well..i cant think abt nething else..i am not normal..i am afraid of being alone..coz then all kinds of thots come to me..then wat gud?..well may be in the long run..i will realize that it was indeed for sm gud..

saw spiderman-2..liked it..at least better than the first..the story moved fwd quite a bit.Mary Jane now know whoz peter parker..and the new villian is ready ..so wait for the third was the final message u get frm the movie..apart frm the some really well shot action scenes..esp the train scene..

one of my frens just told me that Smallville (the supermans serial) will now be aired on star world..in india we get star world..so i may get to see another superhero serial..it was previously being shown on WBTv...i wonder which season they'll show...the story has moved fwd quite a bit in this one too...

hmm...so these are the minor things i think abt when i do not think abt the most happening phase of my life..i keep coming back to it.

I HOPE I GET OVER IT VERY SOOON.








1:53 PM



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in India